Thursday, December 6, 2012

Mood merapu sikit

Hi there,
How are you? how's ur Imaan? Hope everything is good.

I have promised myself to share about my birth experience. But I think it just not the time yet. I assume I may take 2-3 posts merely about that precious moments, starting from pre-labor, in labor and post-labor. See, so lot of things to say and share, hence, considering my fluctuate mood swing (dah fluctuate, swing lagi. hee) I'm having right now, I just don't get the mood to go into that, not just yet. inshaAllah soon :) Well, it may not be that important to u girls but the experience has given me a platinum of lessons so it will be very sad if I don't record it in my blog and let the blazing sensation of the feeling slip away slowly.

Today, as I am starting very-very-very slowly on my thesis writing, trying to get into the right atmosphere and focus on the right thing, I guess all I can say is...Well, it's kinda good head-start for a mom who has to read tonnes of articles and catching up the lost idea concurrently, plus has to play with my brilliant little baby who knows exactly how and when to catch her mom's attention... Haha. Tell you what, As I started  reading a few paragraphs (only), I'd to pause myself for a while right away, searching for the familiarity of the words my eyes had captured, before I can continue to the next paragraphs. Oh there are times where I'd to re-read the same paragraphs a few times to understand what on earth I was reading. Urghhh... My brain is getting incompetent and apparently I'm getting older. Huhu...

Speaking of old... Hmmm... this word has brought me to suddenly visit my blog. This very meaningful word.

We grow older day by day
And now, 2012 is near to the end...

I suddenly feel very sad... Coz I see no achievement in myself.
In terms of spiritual ability and awareness - none. I think I am a shameful useless servant (literal translation as a human being. u know what i mean? no fancy words, just go literal)

Da'wah activity - nope. very little as compared to what I could do coz I am a healthy muslim. no excuse.

As a wife? U can ask my hubby how terrible I am as a wife ( OK. don't ask him. He won't tell the truth. hehe)

As a mom? Hahaha.... I think I am far from being a good mom. Aaron Houdd... that boy, a lot of things need to settle with him. Maryam Saraa... too early to tell, but if I can compare, I was much better in handling Aaron Houdd when he was in Saraa's age. 

career achievement - funny enough if I can translate it into a graph, it actually slunting downwards...Urgh. So sadly sad. heee...
money? Oh I am a jobless person so I definitely am no a rich lady.

Suddenly feels like a loser T_T

Hey, Can I say that having kids (precisely a new one this year) as an achievement? Coz other than that.... I don't think I have any....

OK. get back to what I should do right now.... c ya later.



Currently listening to this boy. Hmmm.... this is something I need to improve too... My heart. I need to fix it. times flies, but why on earth I still can't fix thing as it should be? I am a mom... but still. sometimes.... very into music. Haha... ada hati nak anak hafal Quran tp mak curik2 dengar lagu2 lagha belakang anak.

btw: love this song so much.


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Thursday, November 22, 2012

An Ummi of 2 lil munchkins

Photo: Beautiful foot of my kiddos; Maryam Saraa (1m+) n Aaron Houdd (2y+). Daddy miss you both.....
Houdd's & Saraa's
2.15am : Saraa bangun mintak susu.  In d middle of susukan Maryam Saraa, Aaron Houdd bangun mengadu 'itchy2'. Mintak tolong garu kaki n badan dia yg gatal2....

Sambil susukan Maryam Saraa sambil tolong Aaron Houdd... Maryam Saraa habis susu. Try burp kan tp dia xnak. Letak Saraa and layankan si abang sebab kalau Aaron dh segar nanti lagi susah nk tidorkan semula... Tup tup si adik muntah. Cepat2 angkat. Salinkan baju. Si abang masih merengek mintak di layan. Kesian jugak pada si abang. Last2 dia membawa diri mencari Lola sebab nk susu n kakinya gatal kena gigit sekpr nyamuk sesat...

Si adik pulak... Baru lepas salin diaper n baju, proppp poppp poppp... Poopoo la pulak! Usai menguruskan Saraa, si kecik ni mintak susu semula... Mungkin sebab dah dimuntahkan semuanya tadi. Tengah menyusukan si adik, si abang darang nk tidur dengan Umminya. Terpaksalah Ummi yang masih terkial2 belajar menjadi ibu kepada 2 anak ni bermulti tasking...

 Kesudahannya, Alhamdulillah dua beradik ni berjaya ditidurkan semla. Jam 4.17am semuanya selesai... Tinggallah si Ummi yg terkebil2 mata dh xboleh nk lelap tapi badan dh amat letih. Dah mcm zombie rasanya... Dapatlah melayan Daddy pulak yg berada beribu batu jauhnya dgn perbezaan 4 jam waktu antara kami.

Mula menyedari: Dua beradik ni sering meminta perhatian pada waktu yg serentak. Tak kira waktu tak kira tempat... (tu belom termasuk Daddynya yg pandai carik masa nak call, time anak2 meragam time tu lah phone berbunyi.hihi)

PS: Kalaulah masa yg berbaki ni dimanfaatkan dgn tahajud dan taubat alangkah indahya. Cantiknya Iman. Pesan suami 'xlarat solat xapa. Zikir pon dah baik sangat'. Allahu Rabbi...Sementara menguruskan anak2, sentiasa ada ruang untuk berzikir denan hati mahupun lisan kan?

PSs: Sungguh menghormati dan kagum dengan para ibu lagi2 yg punya anak ramai, ibu tunggal dan sebagainya....Sungguh masih banyak lg yg perlu diri ini pelajari dan perbaiki. Perkara sebegini sebenarnya menjadi rutin harian biasa bagi kebanyakan ibu2 yang mempunyai anak lebih dari 1. Saja dicoretkan pengalaman baru ini buat kenang-kenangan di masa akan datang.

PSss: Masih mencari rhythm meneruskan komitmen selain anak2... Menguruskan anak2, sungguhpon mencabar tp mendamaikan hati... Tp komitmen yg satu ini, kalau dibiarkan sepi semakin hilang semangat utk meneruskannya... Xhabis pk mcm mana nak menyelesaikan masalah x sekepala 2 boss, belom lagi melibatkan krisis skill menulis yg menumpul dan idea2 yg semakin menjauh... Ya Allah permudahkanlah....



Friday, November 2, 2012

Introducing....... Our lil princess!

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate...

Name: Maryam Saraa
DOB: 13/10/2012
Time of birth: 5:24 AM
Place of Birth: DEMC Medical Centre, Shah Alam

Delivery: VBAC (vaginal birth after 1 cesarean), assisted with vacuum.
Baby's weight: 2.86 KG
Baby's height: 52 cm
Head circumference: 31 cm

Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.

We'd chosen the name Maryam Saraa, taken after then name of Maryam the mother of Prophet Isaa, and Saraa the first wife of Prophet Ibrahim.

We pray to Allah to grant her Imaan and blessings... To grow up to be muslimah solehah, as Maryam, a woman who got the nickname "Ya Ukhta Haroon", due to her high level of Taqwa and total devotion to Allah.

Allah has said in the Holy Quran, that Maryam was a woman chosen by Allah above other women of the worlds, and she was the only woman in the world who got pregnant without being touched by any man.  (Ali Imran, 3: 42-47)

There are 2 surahs (chapters) in the Quran with the name related to Maryam (Surah Ali-Imran, and surah Maryam)

And we pray to Allah to grant our Maryam Saraa a noble heart, like the heart of Sarah, the wife of Prophet Ibrahim and the mother of Prophet Ishaq.

Well actually, we had another name to be given to our next baby after Aaron Houdd (if the baby was happen to be a girl). The name existed even before I got pregnant. What's the name? ---- Mawar Anggun! (the elegant rose). We got the name since we were in Dubai last year...

But during my 6th month of pregnancy, I went to BeingMe conference, and there's a sister name Myriam Francois Cerrah. She's a British, was an actress and reverted to Islam in 2003. She's beautiful and intelligent too! She's one of the speaker of the event and I love her very much. Since then, I fell in love with the name Maryam Saraa :) --> here's a little info about herself http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myriam_Francois-Cerrah

Oh I still love the name Mawar Anggun. It's so classy don't you think so? We found it quite hard to decide which name to give to our lil princess. But yeah, in the end, we decided to choose Maryam Saraa instead of Mawar Anggun. My sis said "Tak payah pening, nama kita kan dah ada kat lauh mahfudz" (dah ditakdirkan la maknenya) hehe....

OK. Baby starts to cry... and Aaron is getting out of control now.... got to go... see u in the next entry inshaAllah :)

Maryam Saraa day 1

Maryam Saraa and Aaron Houdd :)

sis Myriam Francois Cerrah.... so prettay isn't she? :)

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Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Tick tock tick tock... Oh my Aaron

39 weeks ++ now.
Daily routine is just as usual, plus every morning has to follow Onni and Aaron to send Tok Daddy to office (dorang takut I sorang2 kat rumah kang terbersalin susah pulak. hehhe)

Masih berkudrat untuk bermain dan meguruskan Aaron. Toddler, boy lagi. So what can u expect? Memang most of the time amat aktif, minta ummi kejar, dukung, berguling dengan dia... Tapi kalau tak larat sangat terpaksa la menolak. Menangis la dia, terutamanya kalau Ummi taknak dukung.

Every now and then goes back to Shah Alam, do laundry, chores - cleaning up kitchen, dust, mop the floor, etc etc....

Weekend. Just follow any event - wedding reception, shopping mall, etc etc....

Common teguran from the makcik in the wedding reception " Laaa, dah tunggu hari masih lagi kuat berjalan kau ye. Terberanak kang"

Kalau makcik2 tu kira kita kenal then I selalu jawab "Memang nak bagi beranak la ni. Dah nama tunggu hari" then gelak2. Hihi....

2 days more Daddy will come back. Alhamdulillah he managed to take a week leaves (Sunday to Thursday). I don't know what he has done cause from what I know, the company still maintain the pantang of no cuti in Oct... Allahuakbar!

So sweetie baby, Daddy has sacrificed so much for us, so please please please wait for Daddy OK!

Jom cerita pasal si Hero Aaron Houdd pulak. Lama rasanya tak cerita pasal Aaron...
Ermmm....

Story 1
Aaron did something which I couldnt recall what was it. Then I said:
Ummi: Clever boy! Aaron anak soleh.
Aaron: Yes, Aaron anak soleh...
then pause a few sec....
Aaron: Aaron anak Nuar, Ummi! (his daddy's name: Anuar)

Story 2
Kalau dulu orang selalu tanya Aaron (even my obgyne) whether he wants baby girl or boy, or brother or sister, he'll consistently answer sister/girl...

Lately, when people ask, he'll answer : Don't want. I want baby only! (-__-)

Story 3
Sometimes I let Aaron play with my bumpy stomach just to get him familiar with this baby thingy, and to build affection and connection between him and the baby.

I  let him play on my belly or touch it when the baby is moving. Long before that, during early pregnancy, I made the move myself and asked him to touch it and told him that the baby was moving..... I never thought that he knew it was my play until now....

Sometimes when the baby is moving, he feels it and he responds accordingly...

Then... He'll selak his baju, shows his big tummy and make it moves...just like what I used to do. And he'll say "Ummi look, got baby in my stomach! Baby's moving! like Ummi's one"

When I ask him "What's in your stomach?"
he'll say "Got baby food Ummi!"

And now, anything he thinks is big, he'll exclaim "Big like Ummi's stomach!" Herm.... is it lovely or annoying? (-___-)

Story 4
Aaron ni memang ada masalah nak gosok gigi. Dari dulu sampai sekarang. Memang tension je setiap kali nak suruh dia gosok gigi. Ada lah sekali dua je dia akan gosok gigi dengan sukarela, itu pun with tonnes of praises...

But one morning, I asked him to brush his teeth. And this is what he replied:
"It's OK Ummi, I brush my teeth like this.......with my finger"
And memang betol la dia buat macam gaya P.ramlee dalam cerita apa ntah... guna finger untuk gosok gigi. Haiyyyaaaa... Where did he get all the ideas!

Aaron's favorite phrases now:
Oh my!
Oh my God!
Oh Dear!
Ya Allahhh!- especially if he reckons something is wrong... or simply after he spilled over something.
Subhanallah!

OK. penuh dramatic sehhhh cara dia sebut....

He also likes to use these in his conversation:
I think so! - if anyone ask him something and he really not sure. Nampak muka dia yg tak sure
Otherwise
Because....
And sekarang dah start letak LAH kat belakang perkataan.... Marah betol Tok Daddy dia....hehehe

And a few other which I can't recall, of course....

Haih, a few days more and Aaron will become ABANG..... Oh I seriously can't imagine how it would be :)

MY 31 MONTH OLD TODDLER!

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Saturday, September 29, 2012

Priority

It's normal to feel serabut when many important things come all at once. It depends on us how we want to react with the situation. Right?

Teringat masa belajar kat sekolah/university dulu, kalau kita pergi motivasi ke apa akan ada lah motivator yang ajar kite quadrant - important, unimportant, urgent, un-urgent... haaaa... ingat tak? hehe...

Actually post kali ni is all about pregnancy.... and other stuffs.... OK. be precise. Pregnancy VS my thesis... Hehe...

Sometimes during my 36 weeks of pregnancy, I've decided to focus more on my childbirth. I know some moms would grin and think I'm a bit exaggerate about this. Just wait for the moment and let it happens as how it should be. What else to prepare?... Yes? No?

As a mom who had already given birth once, I should have not worry much, shouldn't I? But this is just me, being myself. Nak bersalin pon survey hospital bagai nak rak, nak exclusive breastfeed? I read a lottttt and asked a lot of questions too (Alhamdulillah I succeed!)... and now, whether to have a safe and successful VBAC or just rely on the typical hospital procedure in childbirth or simply get another Cesarean birth  ---> has led me to another field of research! Hahaha...

 I'd once decided to prioritize on the childbirth research finding, and hence, my thesis became comparatively my 2nd priority (just for temporary). And I was quite happy with my decision that time...  A lot of new things have been discovered, new insights on childbirth, etc etc... But a lot more to dig and digest... Hypnobirthing, breathing techniques, exercises, the best positions of birthing, the norms and myths of childbirth, whether induction/intervention/medical instruments are necessary, safe baby and safe natural birth, etc etc etc...

But something had happened last week, which has turned my life into haywire and urged my mind to think more about my thesis rather than anything else...

My master journey:

I am currently in my thesis writing mode. According to plan, I'm supposed to submit my thesis on Sept (as that's the dateline given by my co-sv). But well, the reason why this post exists, definitely because I have not yet accomplished the mission. Hehe...

A lot of unexpected things showed out along the process, which slow down the process. I was able to submit my 1st and 2nd chapter within 3-4 weeks gap only, but the result and discussion take longer than expected because of the hiccups. Sometimes I feel like quitting, other time.... Well, just put aside everything, ignore for a couple of days or even a week, and focus on anything else in life... Hah, I'm actually quite pro in doing that. Haha... Well, human... sometimes we got demotivated... right? (alasan!)

I don't want to tell u in detail about what has actually happened and what's going on in my master project (seriously it's not worth to know and yes, it has cost me quite a lot of tears - oh my tears are precious! coz I'm no a wimp).

But for some reasons, nak tak nak memang kena fikir pasal thesis ni melebihi yang lain... And it's very very very dissapointing sebab sepatutnya time macam ni dah boleh relax and just prepare mentally, physically and spiritually towards the childbirth (39 weeks and counting)..tick tock tick tock...

My pregnancy:
But somehow, I gained my strength back... After I got nagged by my hubby :)

 "You've spent a lot of time on your Master. And you've come this far despite the obstacles... and you can still continue on this whenever after the child is born. Tapi masa you nak bersalin nanti, it's your only experience for this only child, and it's a big event too. Whatever happen to you during labor nanti, only you can help yourself. others can't, especially orang2 yang buat awak susah tu, dorang tak ambil kisah pon macam mana urusan awak bersalin nanti... And without knowledge, confidence and all, how can you know what is the best for you and the baby? What if the doc wants to induce, what if you don't know how to push the right way? So I think, it's time for you to just focus on the baby. You've tried hard to please people tapi this time it's time for yourself. you've the right to do so"

And Yaaa, he got the points.... My children are my priority no matter how. If I want to try something new, something that I'm not familiar with, something memang takde experience langsung, I better be prepare... And since that night, I browsed as many info as I can, googled up articles, and joined a few forums that really help me in many ways.

And as far as I could remember, I just vet through articles for thesis writing twice and jenguk2 my writing also twice (for the whole week).... Teheeeee. tak boleh la nak tinggal langsung... siang carik info birthing, tengah2 malam (kalau rajin) buka pulak lembaran thesis... (tapi selalu tak rajin sangat)

Oh, i'd like to share some beneficial website, (in case you are planning for natural childbirth or pondering about the proper childbirth process etc)...
http://www.givingbirthnaturally.com

http://naturalchildbirthworld.com/

http://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth/

And I've also joined these amazing groups:-
Thanks to these groups because now I gain more knowledge and most importantly, confidence to try on my VBAC (trust me if you are not used to chldbirth experience and hanya terikat dengan cakap2 kawan2 about their childbirth experience which are all stereotype - supine position, lie down on bed, dont lift up your butt during pushing or u'll get severe perineum tears etc, u'll be surprise of the new perspective of childbirth)

Sangat2 berdoa semuanya dipermudahkan oleh Allah.... Aminnnn...

https://www.facebook.com/groups/mygentlebirth/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/ICANMalaysia/

One thing to share.... semalam pukul 12.34 pagi hubby call from his Maxis nu. I asked him why he called use that nu. (mahal)... he said another phone run out of batery....and here's the detail....

Me: it's OK. wait until u reach home, charge the phone n call me back. I'm not gonna sleep now.
Him: I'm actually dah depan rumah
Me: Oh, tak pelah then, masuk la rumah dulu. call back later
Him: I'm in front of rumah Meru la ni yanggg (my parents house)

And I straight away went to the front door and... TADAAAAAA, we was really there! I slapped his chest to confirm that that was real. Hahaha...

We went to McD, senyap2 masuk n keluar rumah sebab everybody had just slept... and this morning my dad pon terkejut tiba2 menantu dia buat surprise...

Oh, in case you may ask. My hubby sampai khamis malam (pagi) and akan pulang semula ke Oman sabtu malam. Just a weekend visit (Oman cuti Jumaat and Sabtu)...  Hmmm... it wasn't me, it's his idea OK. I'm doing just fine here...(padahal happy giler).

But now Aaron Houdd pulak demam. within 4 hours he vomited 5 times... (apa yang masuk, terus akan keluar right away). Itu memang simptom demam Aaron Houdd...Still monitoring his condition right now... kalau demam panas sangat have to bathe him with warm water (normally just bogel and lap basah2 je. nak mandi tak sampai hati) and give him paraC. Hope not to that extend... Huhu...

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Thursday, September 20, 2012

Bad news, big hikmah I guess.


Everyone encounters different stage of tasks in a different way. As Muslims, we should believe that all the ujiaan we face will eventually lead us to something good, cause we believe Allah doesn't burden us something that we couldn't bear. Or in other words, Allah only tests us with the ujiaan that is possible for us to solve. "When there's problem, there's a way to tackle it"

Remember this ayaat? ......Allah does not impose upon any soul a duty but to the extent of its ability. It will have [the consequence of] what [good] it has gained, and it will bear [the consequence of] what [evil] it has earned. Our Lord, do not impose blame upon us if we have forgotten or erred. Our Lord, and lay not upon us a burden like that which You laid upon those before us. Our Lord, and burden us not with that which we have no ability to bear. And pardon us; and forgive us; and have mercy upon us. You are our protector, so give us victory over the disbelieving people.... :: 2 : 286 ::

This ayaat is very wonderful! A great reminder and a powerful Du'a too...

And speaking of ujiaan... This is what I'm going to share.

As you know, my hubby and I are now in the LDR phase. It's not easy, and never will be any easier so long as we are in this phase. But this challenge is just part and partial of our marriage journey. Life goes on. Others face different kind of problems in their marriage journey : Trying to conceive a baby, financial, health, etc etc. Yet, life goes on.

My pregnancy is now 37 weeks. 2 weeks ago, I received a call from my hubby, saying that his company may want to freeze any leave in Oct due to some big events i.e launching new Islamic product of the bank and grand official opening of the Islamic Bank's division (sort of). And tadaaa, my EDD is in Oct! when I first hear the news, I felt so mad! What I just heard was so nerves wrecking!

I took a deep breath to digest the news. I could no longer hear my hubby's voice clearly, just heard him calling "sayang, sayang" a few times after that. Can you imagine that? I'm about to give birth to OUR baby, not mine alone, and the most important person, the one that I really need at that moment, may not join me during that big event! I think it's totally make sense if I feel mad. And yes, I was so mad that I just blurted anything I wanted-didn't really care of my hubby's feeling. Yeah yeah, all the blame was on him! Well, he's the one who leave us, we are still here. not going anywhere!

But that didn't last long. I asked permission to end the conversation right away, as I need to calm myself before I hurt my hubby's feeling with my unconscious-unthinking words. But my hubby gave me only like...5 minutes to calm down, he called me back.... But Alhamdulillah, within that short period of time, I gained my rationality back. I just told him that I think it's Ok if it's really happen. I think I'll be able to handle the situation. I think I'll be fine. just keep on praying that the process will be smooth.That's all I need. In the end I did tell him that most importantly, I want to make sure that Allah is always with me, esp during the hard time - And I said all that with tears I tried hard to hold back.

Up till now, my hubby is still trying his best to ask for exception to take leaves (though he's the mastermind of the product, and one of the main person for the whole Bank event). If not, he'd be able to take long leave - paternity leave + block leave for 10 days. But now.... All we can do now is to pray, and my hubby just need to try his best. Twakkal 'ala Allah. inshaAllah there must b a way....We'll see how it turns out.

::Reminiscene of my first week after delivery 2 years back = My hubby was the hero of the story. He helped me in many ways: Brought the necessities, provide whatever necessary, clean up my wastes and discharges, massage my feet, shoulder, head, whatever...Only him can do this to me, without me even have to ask. without shame :: 

OK. that's one story.

Remember my last post about Looking for a malay/muslim confinement lady (CL)?
I goggled here and there, asked friends and people about this, posted status in FB wall and in few forums. I went to Shadira spa and some other places myself to survey. Alhamdulillah, I found 2 candidates that fit my requirement... And out of this 2, I chose this makcik from Malacca that I knew from a blogger. From her review that she posted in her blog, this Makcik did a superb service. I made a few calls with the Makcik, asked questions, and lastly, close the deal!--- This happened couple of months ago, during early Ramadhan.

From the early discussion, the agreement was to take her for 15 days home-care service for RM2K... But I've to deposit RM500 in her account to confirm booking. OK. easy peasy.

But since then, I called many times to ask for her account nu. She said she'll give me when she's home. She was in duty everytime I called, and she didn't remember her account nu. At last she said, I don't have to pay the deposit cause we already meet the agreement. Coincidentally she has one customer in Taman Melawati end of Sept so she'll go straight to me after finish her work there. She remember my name, safe my contact nu. and she said she'll call me back on my EDD, just to check whether or not I have delivered the baby. If yes, somebody just have to fetch her at  Batu 3 KTM station. It's quite weird though, dealing business in such way. I somehow felt unsafe.

And my gut was telling me the truth. This morning, the Makcik called me and told me that she has to cancel the service because she just realized she already has one customer just 5 days after my EDD. That customer has already confirmed the booking since June. I asked her if she already has customer since June, why on earth she didn't tell me right away when I asked her last time??? She said she didn't check her schedule until last night! What! that is so insane, doesn't make sense at all! If she has that attitude, I bet I'm not the only one who face this problem.

I was so mad and frustrated but I don't know why I didn't scold her. Makcik tak makcik, this is so unprofessional! She apologized but that wasn't enough! It's easy for her to just run away but I am the one who have to face the consequences. Only 2 weeks ++ to my EDD, and now I don't have any CL!

I called my hubby and told him about this. Pity him. I didn't mean to make him worry, but I have to let him involve this time. Before this, I took charge of almost everything regarding this CL, hospital survey, baby items etc. But now, at this time, he has to...

So we are now trying our best to find a good CL in last minute. Normally we have to book a few months early for the CL especially if we have one really good. But at this last minute time, I just hope to solve this problem ASAP.

I don't care how good the service she could provide. But the very basic thing must correct- attitude. Do you think it's good to let people in trouble and you just walk away from the problem you created for others, as long as you are OK?

My hubby said "It's Ok. mesti ada hikmah. Kita usaha dulu. inshaAllah."
I just hope we can solve the problem. My hubby is away. Farrr away, not away like, just 100 miles away...my moms working. And I have Aaron Houdd to take care of. I've decided to try for VBAC delivery despite my previous history of CPD. but just in case I have to undergo another c-sect, with my hubby is away, who's going to take care of me and the baby? She knew my situation very well. We discussed about this, I told her about my condition and my concern. If only she ever thinks of the consequences of  her action....

I can't predict what comes next. But I just hope that in the end, I'll be OK. and the baby is alright. Right now I don't really in the mood of telling you in detail about my Master's progress, the rejection of pengurangan yuran which cost me RM 1300++ for this semester padahal I've already in writing mode (no point of paying the research fees which cost me more than half of the total price), and my lecturer's intention to add some more labwork towards the end of my master's journey (I don't deny the fact that what she's doing is for my own good, but indeed, the time is not suitable.not now!). All...came at once!

It's like I'm having a can of worms... a major quagmire in this critical time. A long and deep sigh may seem to suit me... I feel burdened, and yes I sometimes feel out of control.

But...
Do you remember the story of Prophet Ayyub, on how Allah tests him with stages of ujiaan, each time was great and heavy. He lost his health, wealth, children, even his wife....Yet Prophet Ayyub's Imaan neither break nor shatter. Allahuakbar, Allahuakbar, Allahuakbar.... the story of Prophet Ayyub is my strength every time I feel so out of control.....though... I must admit, deep inside, my heart is ache, my emotion is disturbed, my brain keeps on producing tonnes of questions-the top one is Why me? why now? and I am not excluded from comparing my journey with others - like why I have to face stages of obstacle just to achieve (just) one goal? why others' are easier?

But then.... I realize that I have no right to blame anyone, precisely Allah... for all that happen. Because this is my life story. Others' are different. And yes, maybe my prayer is not sincere enough, my effort is not hard enough, and my love to Allah is not deep enough... Before I question Allah, I have to question myself first. Am I a good servant, and have I forgotten easily all other ni'mat Allah has given me.... The nikmat is wayyyy to much than the tests he's given.... Just like what Prophet Ayyub asked his wife before he let her go...

55:13
So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?
(Ar-rahman, 55:13)
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Sunday, July 29, 2012

on something truly sad

Assalamu'alaikum.

I should be writing about something else. I've 2 things in my mind, both are about child's education. I'm actually restraining myself from updating my blog right now, coz I've not yet complete my 3rd chapter of my thesis (which I am now 3 weeks delay of my dateline-even though not entirely my fault-but yeah, still...that's my first priority now)...

But the pressure of thesis writing is sometimes unbearable! especially when you stuck on something that you have no total control over, and that delay your work, hence change your entire plan... I'm 7months pregnant now and I need to speed up.  Things will be more complicated if I couldn't afford to complete my first draft before delivery. "Allahumma Laa Sahla Illa ma ja'altahu sahla. Wa anta taj'al khazana idza ma syi'ta sahla.... Aminnnn"

And yes... writing an entry in my dearly blog is totally different feeling. It's like the best place you can visit whenever you want, especially during the time you want to look back on your precious memories. It's also the trusted place where you can jot down whatever you want, considering you don't mind what people may judge you :D I never mind not having any reader, as my main objective is to keep the memories alive, and to share something that I know, especially about parenting and children education. Share aje lah, org baca or tak lain cerita. Hopefully it can be some kind of my effort of spreading knowledge :)

And oh yes, speaking of blog- I'd read one of my friend's blog about friendship couple of days ago. She did mention about how sometimes friendship becomes something so weird- like you know- you used to have close friends where you share almost everything but things changed after everyone gets married or starts a new life (I'm rephrasing her words in my own way and understanding by the way.hehe)... She also mentioned about having to remove her friends in her blog who apparently doesn't really seem to care about her life anymore. Mind you her blog is in private mode. So it might make sense. She only maintain true blog-friends (in a sense) that still care for her, and she'd of course care for them too... Overall, it's about quality friendship...

I somehow agree to her points- quality friendship. Like I always say, I'm no a hardcore blogger. I don't mind not having a lot of followers. I do maintain some blogs, be it from the owner that I know in real life, or those who I just found in this blogging world. I choose them not because they are popular, having a lot of followers and what not. I choose to maintain reading their blogs because they have something to give me, something beneficial in term of knowledge,inspiration and motivation, and maybe much more, even if they have only like 12 followers, I really don't care. They are good mothers, inshaAllah good muslims. I've met new friends in blogging, friends that I can share things and thoughts though we never meet in person.

I know some of my friends keep updating my life by reading my blog. Indeed, I'm using the same method too. Fully understood, things nowadays are so much different than back then. We are tight with a lot of commitments - work, study, hubby, children, family, business, you name it... Sometimes it's not that we totally forget our friends, but maybe...maybe there are constrains that keep us busy. And I'm sure we still remember each other and the longing of old friends stick around together is so deep inside our hearts... That is why. I hope my dear friends can steal some of their times to update their blogs, because I need to know they are now truly happy, truly alive, as I am happy for their happiness. ..And most importantly, coz I don't want our friendship to fade, for whatever reason it may be.

So friends - esp my closest friends - you know who you are - please lah rajin sikit update blog naa. I miss you all so much. FB is not the same as we don't really tell our stories in FB. nak call pun kadang2 tak menyempat, tak berangkat, kalau you all tak return my call pun nanti macam2 speculation syaitan dok invent dalam hati.... I know you guys are busy. everybody is busy. even Aaron Houdd is busy. Hehe.. But please lah.... OK?! 

P/S: I have a friend that we met since form 1. And we still can call each other despite how busy our life is. Sometimes we meet. It's simple. When one of us call each other during wrong timing, we just have to call back or text each other later on. And we still manage to make silly jokes and share stories - just like old times.... Oh of course, she is a career woman, married, and has baby too.... Some other friends, although we don't meet each other due to distant etc, but we keep on buzzing each other's life through FB message, YM, blog, etc... I think at least we make use of the techno wisely. hehe... 
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Sunday, July 15, 2012

07.07.07-07.07.12: Our Marrriage journey...(d real journey)

Masa zaman anak dara dulu, kadang2 ada jugak berangan nak kawen sebab nak jadi isteri solehah and nak masuk syurga melalui tiket isteri solehah. Ada banyak hadith2 sahih menceritakan tentang kelebihan mjadi isteri solehah, yang paling femes is "isteri yg solehah boleh masuk syurga melalui pintu2 mana yg disukainya" (translation ringkas of the hadeeth)...

Hakikatnya, ia bukanlah semudah yang dibayangkan. Untuk menjadi seorang isteri yang solehah, cabaran nya bukan calang2. Bila sudah bergelar isteri, barulah diri ini memahami kenapa begitu besarnya ganjaran yang Allah sediakan buat seorang isteri solehah "Kerana ianya satu tugas dan cabaran yang amat berat"...

Biasalah manusia, iman tinggi rendah ye tak. Kadang2 kalau tak kena timing, sikit salah saja darah pun menggelegak sampai kepala. Tambah lagi hidup sbg suami isteri, pasti ada pasang surutnya, baik gadohnya, manis pahitnya....

Syukur Alhamdulillah, selama 5 tahun perkahwinan ni, belum pernah sekalipun kita berperang sehingga ketahuan orang luar. Usik mengusik yang menjengkelkan tu perkara biasalah kalau dapat suami yang annoying. Tahan ajelah ye tak. Hihi... Dan doa saya sbg seorang isteri pastilah ingin melalui kehidupan berumah tangga yang harmoni sehingga akhir hayat...

Berkahwin di usia muda, antara cabaran yang biasa dilalui adalah masalah kewangan dan pengurusan emosi. Kedua2 ini boleh menjadi punca pergadohan sekiranya tidak ditangani dgn baik. Patutlah orang tua2 selalu berpesan, suami isteri perlu banyak bertoleransi....

Tak sampai 8 bulan usia pernikahan kita, Allah telah menguji kita dengan 1 ujian yang tak tertanggung beratnya. Hati sama2 merasai kepedihan dan keperitannya. Terlalu berat ujian tersebut sehingga benar2 menguji keutuhan cinta dan kesabaran kita. Peristiwa itu memberi kesan di hati sehingga kini, dan mungkin sampai bila2. Namun sy amat bersyukur mempunyai suami yang penyabar seperti awak, yang banyak mengajar sy erti perkongsian hidup, terutamanya di dalam berkongsi rasa. Alhamdulillah, setelah 5 tahun berdoa dan berharap, akhirnya Allah kabulkan juga doa kita. InshaAllah tiada perkara seperti itu akan berlaku lagi selepas ini... Jika ada sekalipun, kita tetap akan laluinya bersama...

Kemanisan sesebuah rumahtangga sering terbina di atas landasan kepayahan hidup bersama, dengan syarat kita sama2 redha dan tabah. Kita pernah melalui banyak kepayahan bersama. Wang scholar pernah berjasa membayar bil2 elektrik dan talipon, pernah dihulur kepada family, dan membayar monthly installment satu2nya kenderaan kita pada waktu itu... Alhamdulillah, sy pernah merasai itu semua. Siapa tahu, seorang isteri yang belum berkerja pun masih boleh menyumbang kepada financial keluarga.... 

Dan takkan pernah saya lupa sampai bila2 betapa berjasanya ferrari merah kesayangan awak, kepada kita sekeluarga. Kereta itulah yang membawa kita setiap hari utk mencari rezeki dan menuntut ilmu, kereta itulah yang membawa saya yg sarat mengandung ingin bersalinkan Aaron Houdd, dan kereta itulah yang membawa ibu (my MIL) berbelanja hampir setiap bulan sekali. Yes, walaupun ketika hujan bumbungnya bocor sehingga banjir di dalam and awak terpaksa melipat seluar sehingga ke tulang keting, dan ketika panas teriknya meresap sampai ke kulit, walaupun kereta itu kecil sahaja dan buruk pula, walaupun kereta itu seringkali uzur di bawa ke bengkel. 3 tahun perkahwinan kita menggunakan kereta itu sahaja, dan Alhamdulillah, mungkin kerana awak yang mendidik hati sy, tidak sekalipun sy merungut dan merasa malu dgn menaiki kereta itu. Sebaliknya, paling sy suka adalah kerana kereta itu kecil, jadi setiap kali kita naik bersama tiada masalah langsung untuk berpegangan tangan dan bersentuhan bahu. Itulah kenikmatan terbesar menaiki kereta yang dilihat kecil dan buruk itu... Sehinggalah kita mampu untuk memiliki sebuah kereta lain, namun kita takkan pernah melupai jasa kereta itu, walaupun bg sesetengah org mungkin tidak selesa apabila memandu atau menaiki kereta tu...

Mengandung, melahirkan, menyusukan dan membesarkan anak, bukanlah satu proses yang mudah. Seorang isteri akan menjadi kuat bila suaminya sentiasa di sisi memberi sokongan dan membantu sedaya mampu. Pregnant pertama, tak pernah sekalipun sy check up seorang diri. Ketika bersalin, hampir semua perkara awak lakukan untuk kami anak beranak. Teringat ketika tempoh seminggu bersalin, luka czer masih terlalu menyengat, nak menukar posisi menyusukan anak pun susah, apatah lagi untuk membersihkan diri di bilik air. Awaklah yang datang, membasuh kotoran saya, yang mana seumur hidup saya tak pernah seorang pun melihatnya, apatah lagi menguruskannya. Masih teringat air mata laju berderaian dek kerana emosi yang bercampur baur. Malu, terharu, syukur, dan macam2 lagi... Jasa itu terlalu besar untuk saya balas.

Awak bukanlah jenis suami yang berkira. Tidak pernah berat tulang untuk membantu. Tidak pernah high demand itu ini. Sebaliknya sentiasa memudahkan tugas isteri. Sejak sebelum menikah, sy tahu awak seorang yang sangat aktif. Bila bekerjaya menjadi seorang yang workaholic. Agak menakjubkan bila awak boleh pulang sebelum matahari terbenam. Menjadi perkara biasa bila saya terpaksa menunggu sehingga lewat malam atau awal pagi. Outstation pula seperti rutin kerja yang biasa. Semua itu sy terima dengan baik. Alhamdulillah tidak pernah pula kita bertegang urat kerana ini, kecualilah sesekali sy ada mengingatkan awak, supaya tidak terlalu sibuk bekerja sehingga tidak perasan anak membesar. Namun, sungguh pun sibuk, awak masih tetap ada ketika sy memerlukan. Sentiasa memberi sokongan dan dorongan ketika diri ini lemah. Walaupun sibuk, awak tetap meluangkan masa bersama kami, bercuti, berjalan, atau bermalas2an di rumah :)

Namun bila kita diuji dengan PJJ, lain benar rasanya. Berat benar terasa ujian ini. Sungguh, mungkin kesibukan awak dan kebiasaan saya menerima situasi berjauhan dengan suami adalah latihan yang Allah berikan, namun tetap payah rasanya bila awak tiada di sini. Hanya mereka2 yang melalui sahaja akan memahami... Tapi Alhamdulillah, belum pernah lagi semangat ini rebah ke bumi, sy tetap masih teguh berdiri bersama zuriat2 kita. Setiap hari sy berdoa agar diberi kekuatan dan kesabaran sementara kita berjauhan. 

Saya berharap, perkahwinan kita berkekalan hingga ke syurga. Saya harap kita boleh tua bersama, melihat anak2 membesar bersama2, dan melalui hidup juga bersama2.....

Maafkan saya yang selalu melawan kata, merajuk tak tentu hala, atau merapu bila berbicara. 
Doakan sy menjadi isteri, ibu dan anak yang solehah.
Semoga kita tabah melalui hidup bersama :)
Terima kasih atas segalanya



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Saturday, July 7, 2012

07.07.07 - 07.07.12 : Our marriage journey (pre-marriage)

Entry ni mungkin bagi sesetengah orang dirasakan tidak perlu, atau entry menggedik yang hanya sepatutnya menjadi rahsia suami/isteri dan anak2 sahaja...

Apa yg bakal dicoretkan di sini tiada satu pun kisah dalam kain, juga tiada kisah melampau yang perlu ditutup. InshaAllah.... Sekadar perkongsian, juga apa yg tercoret adalah semata2 untuk dikenang dikemudian hari, mungkin satu hari nanti bila kami membuka semula blog ini, membacanya bersama dan mungkin akan tersenyum atau menangis bersama :)

Our first anniversary, 07.07.08.... Eh, awak nampak muda lah dlm gambar ni, tapi Jie nampak sama je dulu dengan sekarang :)
********

Mohamad Noranuar Bin Sajari,
Suamiku, sahabatku, Imamku, bapa kepada zuriat2 ku, kekasih hatiku...

Alhamdulillah, usia pernikahan kita memasuki usianya yang ke 5. Terasa cepat benar masa berlalu. Terasa seolah-olah baru semalam diri ini menjadi isterimu yang sah. Sungguh cepat rasanya masa berlalu. Di usia ini, kita telah diamanahkan zuriat2 yang soleh, penyejuk mata dan penyeri rumah tangga. Syukur Alhamdulillah... 

Mengimbas kenangan ketika di Uni dulu, pertama kali kita berjumpa ketika meeting program persatuan. Malam itu, semua AJK yang hadir memang tidak asing lagi bagi saya. Kecuali awak. Kebetulan awak ketua Unit san saya timbalan awak. Malam itulah detik pengenalan kita bermula. Dan tidak pernah sy sangka pengenalan kita akan menjadi seakrab hari ini :)

Mungkin inilah yang dinamakan takdir. Selepas malam itu, kita banyak bertemu di program2 yang lain. Tak teringat berapa banyak NGO luar kampus yang kita sertai bersama, TANPA DIRANCANG. Tapi yang paling banyak mendekatkan kita adalah program2 di IIS. Sungguh banyak saya belajar di situ. Satu pengalaman yang takkan pernah saya lupakan. 

Dulu, Ferari Merah kesayangan awak WFY 768 (baca:kancil merah OK) sering dilihat di mana2 di sekitar kawasan kampus. Pemandunya sering bertukar2. Kereta tersebut memberi banyak jasa kepada pergerakan islam di dalam dan luar kampus. Kereta tersebut jugalah yang banyak kami tumpang ke mana2. Teringat setiap kali ke mana2, awak sering ditemani oleh 4 orang anak gadis. Sering menjadi bahan usikan "Hai, Anuar, belum2 dah cukup kuota?" Hahaha.... Usikan itu berlarutan hatta sehingga kita sudah bertunang. Tapi tak sedikit pun hati ini terasa berkecil hati. Malah geli hati dgn gurauan2 sahabat2 tersayang...

Malam bersejarah adalah pada 5 Ramadhan 1427. Tahun 2006, tahun akhir kita di Uni. Malam ketika awak datang 'menziarah' di kolej. Malam ketika awak bertanya soalan cepu emas yang amat berani, tanpa perlu menggunakan mana2 orang tengah...
"Oh, jadi awak masih 'kosong'?"
Angguk
"Kalau macam tu, sudikah kalau saya nak mengisi kekosongan tu?"
Membuatkan saya amat malu dengan Kak Shikin yang menemani pada waktu itu. Hahaha...

Setiap orang punya kisah cinta mereka. Begitu juga dengan kita. Ujian bermula seawal perancangan untuk bernikah. Bukan sukar untuk menikah di usia muda. Pada waktu itu keinginan awak ditentang hebat oleh keluarga awak sendiri. Banyak alasan yang diberi: Terlalu muda, macam mana nak bagi anak orang makan, blah blah blah... Tapi concern terbesar mereka adalah kenapa perlu menikah muda? Kenapa tidak membalas jasa ibu dahulu? Bkerja, beri duit pada ibu, etc....

Walaupun pada waktu itu awak sudah beberapa bulan bekerja, dan saya tahu awak tidak pernah gagal membantu ibu dari segala segi, sedari dulu lagi. Namun bukan mudah untuk mengubah persepsi. Apatah lagi persepsi orang2 lama yang telah banyak 'makan garam'. Alhamdulillah, kita berjaya memiliki rumah sendiri beberapa bulan sebelum menikah. Dengan membeli rumah, diharapkan dapat meyakinkan mereka tentang keseriyusan awak dan kita untuk mencorak masa depan sendiri. Namun bukan semudah yang disangka... 

Tentangan hebat dirasakan amat menguji kesabaran dan keutuhan cinta. Lebih2 lagi bila objektif utama adalah untuk menjalin cinta yang suci selepas pernikahan. Namun bukanlah bermaksud keluarga mertua ku (keluarga awak) tidak merestui hubungan kita. Ibu sangat baik. Alhamdulillah bagaimana berbeza pendapat dan pemikiran, tidak pernah sekalipun saya dan ibu berselisih faham. Malah sehingga kini ibu sangat banyak memberi ruang kepada kita untuk mencorak rumah tangga kita sendiri.

Alhamdulillah, akhirnya doa kita dimakbulkan. Setelah banyak ikhtiar, akhirnya pernikahan kita berjaya juga dilangsungkan. Keluarga pihak saya memang dari hari pertama awak datang, soalan pertama ayah adalah sejauh mana seriusnya hubungan ini, dan ayah amat suka bila awak mahu menjadikan saya isteri awak yang sah :)

Masih ingatkah awak ketika hari pertunangan kita pada 1 Muharram 1428, awak dengan tidak malu nya berada di depan barisan pihak lelaki dan duduk di sebelah ayah dan Wak Jani, wakil sebelah awak... Awak pula yang mahu becakap pada majlis itu. Memang lah reason awak sebab hanya awak sorang saja yang tahu segala perancangan kita, tapi kalau ikut adat memang fail lah. Semua orang gelakkan awak masa tu... Eee... tak maluuuuu! :)

Majlis pernikahan amat sederhana. Memadai dengan wang simpanan awak yang setahun bekerja, dan wang simpanan saya yang baru setengah tahun bekerja. Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.... Kesederhanaan itu disambut dengan doa2 yang ikhlas datangnya dari sahabat2 handai. Allah mudahkan urusan kita. Rezeki melimpah ruah. Ramai yang datang membantu tanpa diduga. Semuanya nampak dengan jelas ketika di majlis di rumah pihak perempuan. Walaupun penat, masing2 berpuas hati dan Alhamdulillah, paling penting tiada hati yang terluka. Begitulah matlamat walimatul urus: Menyatukan hati2 dan merapatkan silaturrahim, bukannya menjadi punca pergadohan hanya kerana soal2 warna tema, hantaran, dan souvenir.

Dan di malam persandingan, masih teringat pengantin lelaki yang memakaikan inai di jari2 pengantin perempuan pada pukul 3 pagi, kerana yang lain sibuk dengan tugasan masing2. Waktu yang singkat itu sempat membuahkan gelak tawa kita berdua. Mana tidaknya, bila dibasuh, ada banyak lubang2 kosong di kuku yang tak kena inai. Haiyyaaa :)

Pernahkah kalian melihat baju pengantin terkena air tumpah? Haaa... itulah yang berlaku kepada saya! Pada hari makan beradap, tidak semena2 bapa mertua saya telah tertumpahkan air bandungnya dan entah macam mana, terkena pada kain baju saya yang berwarna putih! Oh betapa tensyennya waktu itu, tapi pengantin mesti kena sentiasa senyum... Bila diimbas kembali, geli hati pula rasanya...

Dan ketika sedang menjadi raja sehari itu, saya juga dalam masa yang sama telah menjadi rujukan adik2 dan saudara mara terdekat tentang banyak perkara kerana saya dan suami lah mastermind di sebalik majlis pernikahan dan persandingan kami. Hampir kesemuanya kami uruskan sendiri. Bukan keluarga tidak membantu. Cuma memang tak menang tangan ketika itu. Akibatnya, tengah dok makan beradap, ada je yang datang bertanya itu ini, tengah sesi fotografi pun sempat juga pause sekejap menguruskan urusan2 domestik. Tapi kemeriahan suasana begitu terasa bahagianya, terutamanya matlamat kami untuk turun bertemu para tetamu yang datang mendoakan, menjadi kenyataan. Memang kami lebih gemar jika pengantin tidak hanya duduk di pelamin. Kerana para tetamu yang datang itu adalah tetamu majlis kita, maka lebih baik jika dapat bersua muka dengan seramai mungkin. 

Walaupun pengantin sendiri yang drive untuk outdoor photography session, tp itu tidak menjadi masalah langsung. Sama juga situasinya ketika menikah, awak dengan siap bersongkok bersamping menjadi driver untuk majlis pernikahan awak sendiri. Sungguh tidak ekslusif bukan? Tapi itu juga tidaklah mencacatkan hari2 bahagia kami, kerana bahagianya sesebuah pasangan bukanlah pada 1 hari persandingan/pernikahan itu, tapi pada setiap hari selepas pernikahan... 

Kesimpulan terhadap majlis pernikahan dan persandingan kita, memang amat berterabur sebenarnya! kedua2 pihak adalah anak sulung dan baru pertama kali mengadakan majlis besar begini, maka banyak perkara yang dibuat ala2 'belasah aje lah'. Di pihak awak, lagi lah sangat berterabur kerana tak ramai yang boleh membantu, adik2 kecil2 dan saudara mara pun tak ramai. Awaklah yang buat hampir semua perkara ketika majlis di Johor. Namun Alhamdulillah, semuanya telah berakhir dengan baik, cukup makanan, cukup souvenir, tetamu datang dengan doa2 mereka buat kita. Alhamdulillah...

Saya tak pernah lupa satu perkara yang awak pernah ungkapkan kepada saya ketika kita baru bernikah. Kata awak, "Saya bersyukur masuk di dalam keluarga awak, di mana saya merasakan sebuah kasih sayang yang baru, yang begitu kuat rasanya. Paling penting, saya tidak pernah menyangka punya family mertua yang amat sporting dan tidak sedikitpun menyukarkan saya untuk menikahi awak.  Tiada majlis risik, tidak perlu banyak2 cincin, tidak meletakkan syarat minima untuk hantaran dan mahar, hanya ayah cakap 'ikut kemampuan lah, tapi janganlah sampai rasa harga itu tidak releven'...Cuma ayah banyak kali berpesan, jaga awak dengan sebaik mungkin. Dan saya takkan mungkir janji saya pada ayah, juga itulah janji saya pada diri saya sendiri sejak hari pertama awak menjadi isteri saya"

Pernah suatu hari saya bertanya jenis soalan yang isteri2 suka bertanya dan suami2 tak suka mendengar :)
"Tak menyesal kahwin dengan saya? Muda2 dah jadi suami orang, pegang tanggungjawab besar. Kalau kawhin lewat sikit macam yang diorang sarankan mungkin sekarang awak lebih enjoy"

Awak menjawab:
"Tidak pernah sedetik pun dalam hari saya menjadi suami awak saya rasa kesal. Mereka mungkin beranggapan kalau berkahwin tidak boleh membalas jasa ibu. Tapi awak sendiri tengok, saya belum pernah culas. Malahan sebagai abang yang sulong, sampai sekarang saya akan membantu. Itu memang tanggungjawab saya tak kisah lah saya berstatus apa pun...

Mereka mungkin merasakan yang saya mungkin akan mengabaikan tanggungjawab saya. Saya perlu berkhidmat untuk keluarga... Hakikatnya saya juga manusia biasa yang memerlukan sokongan, motivasi dan bila diri rasa down, saya perlukan seorang teman yang boleh memujuk dan mendamaikan hati. Saya bukan robot. Dan saya tidak pernah salah membuat keputusan dengan menikahi awak, dan bernikah awal. Kerana tanggungjawab saya yang besar sebagai penanggung keluarga lah yang menyebabkan saya lebih2 memerlukan awak. Di kala orang lain susah, saya menjadi tempat meluahkan perasaan dan sebagainya... Tapi di kala saya susah, hanya awak seorang yang faham. Saya tidak perlu cakap yang saya ada masalah, tapi awak boleh tahu. Saya tidak perlu cerita dari A-Z, tapi awak tahu apa yang saya perlukan. Seumur hidup saya, tidak pernah saya rasa ada orang benar2 ambil berat terhadap saya dan mahu mengambil pusing tentang kesusahan saya, melainkan awak. So yes, saya tidak pernah menyesal, sebaliknya saya bersyukur"...............

Jika awak baca entry ni (dan entry yang selepas ini), saya harap awak boleh tersenyum sambil mengimbas hari2 kita bersama.... 5 tahun adalah fasa perkenalan dan adaptasi di dalam sesebuah rumah tangga. Banyak benda yang kita belajar, terutamanya untuk belajar menerima dan berlapang dada. Terima kasih kerana semangat dan dorongan awak selama ni, terutamanya di dalam mendidik saya menjadi isteri solehah...

Cube tengok pengapit lelaki. Syapid Sajari pengapit bidang terjun... mcm nak pergi berkelah aje baju dia. Tp family perempuan tak kisah pun... layan aje.... :)



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Monday, July 2, 2012

Keletah Aaron Houdd yg dah 28 month old

Kisah 1:
Suatu petang Aaron Houdd bermandi manda dengan riang nya sehinggalah masuk waktu maghrib. Semua orang pun menunaikan solat maghrib berjemaah kecuali Ibu yg menemani Aaron mandi. Keluar sahaja dari bilik air, cepat2 Aaron Houdd ke sejadah comel khas untuk nya yang telah siap terbentang.... And ikut solat dalam keadaan mongel. Eeeee.... tak malu.....

(buat makmum di belakang menahan gelak especially time Aaron Houdd sujud. Haiyyaaa)

Kisah 2:
Aaron Houdd baru lepas mandi pagi. Tapi taknak pakai diaper. Tiba2 dia jalan terkepit2 mencari2 tempat. Ummi Aaron pun suspicious and cepat2 ingin menarik Aaron Houdd ke bilik air. Tapi tak sempat sebab terus Aaron Houdd peepee di depan tv. 

Ummi: Aaron Houdd, why did u peepee there? Shoudn't you peepee in the toilet, boy?
Aaron: Got ants there Ummiyo! (nada memberitahu dengan excited)
Ummi: So you pee on the ants? That's bad sayang. Now see, there's peepee everywhere
Aaron: That's why... don't go there! - sambil menuding jari ke arah tempat peepee nya (nada marah bercampur arahan)

(kesian ants yang tidak bersalah. hehe)

Kisah 3:
Si Ummi yang kepenatan dan kepanasan berbaring di atas katil. Datang si Aaron dengan sebotol losyen baby yang dah nak habis. Dek kerana mengantuk sangat Ummi pun layan saje keletah Aaron.

Aaron: Ummi, want your leg please!
Ummi: What you wanna do sayang?
Aaron: Cipit Ummi.
Ummi: What is that?
Aaron: Cipittt Ummiyoooo!
Ummi yang mengantuk pun bagi aje lah kakinya kepada Aaron sambil dalam kepala dok berfikir apakah itu cipit? Perkataan baru ke?

Sejurus mendapat kaki Ummi, Aaron Houdd terus melumur losyen ke atas Umminya dengan banyak sekali. Dekat nak habis jugak la satu botol. Kemudian dia memicit kaki umminya dengan jari jemarinya yang kecik tu...

Aaron: There... cipit cipit Ummi! 

cipit = picit

(Oh so sweettttt....kan?)

Kisah 4:
Aaron: Onni, want honey star please!
Selepas beberapa saat Onni pun datang bersama semangkuk kecil honey star
Onnie: Here you are. Eat your sweet honey star OK.
Aaron: It's not sweet Onni, its honey star! (nada seperti orang tua membetulkan budak2)

(Aaron Houdd la yang tahu and betul semua ye)

Tidooo dengan nyenyakkkk

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Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Sharing is caring :)

Oooo who's head and fingers? :P

Assalamu'alaikum dear mommies! or mommies to b :)

Today I'd like to SHARE about SHARING. Yelah, sharing is caring kan? :)

Do you notice how your children will react when they are asked to share whatever they have in their hands? say, maybe their food, toys, or even adik? Hehe...

This is what normally comes from my son:
"Aaron Houdd, can I have some --------?"
"Cannot. It's mine!"
"Ok. Can we share?"
"Cannot! / I don't want!"

Or if its food, he'll sometimes reply like this:
"Cannot. I'm hungry!"

Oh boy!.

At first I was so worried. Then, I found an article about this from babycentre. It's actually quite normal for a kid his age, especially if he has strong character and background of high potency of being dominant (first or only child, taken care by close relatives, etc).

But as parents, we surely don't want this attitude to prolong until they turn older. right? Of course we want them to be generous and concern about others too. 

So here are some tips that may help in educating our children to be more generous. InshaAllah :)

1. Solat Jamaah - how is solat jamaah related to this topic? Oh its actually one of the best tool to educate our children to have more sensitivity towards others. As solat jemaah gives a lot of tremendous impact in our life, it also be able to teach our children about unity and responsibility. There's vast difference between a family who practice solat jemaah and a family who is not. If solat jemaah becomes one of family compulsory event, the family normally has no hurdle eating together, communicating and sharing other things as well.

2.  Eating together - Let's make a simple rule in the house. Nobody eats in front of the tv, or eating alone while others are home. Easy. If we eat together, we'll share the food. If the amount is little, everybody'd have small portion only, and nobody will left behind. My father always reminds us that if we want to spare food for someone, make sure we apportion the food before dining time, not spare it as if it's a leftover from anybody else. Eating together is also the best way to create good communication environment.

3. Sharing is OK. Nobody will lose - As parents, we have to always remind our kids that it's OK to share something that we have with someone else. A 2 year old kid might not understand about this, but surely he'll get the point later on. But make sure we- as parents or adults, have to initiate this routine. Remember, kids learn faster from observation! It's very contradicting if we ask our kids to share but we show to them the opposite attitude- e.g., eat snack in front of the tv alone, without even invite others to have it some. Or simply have our meal alone while our spouse/mom/sister is doing chores or reading newspaper.   

When I was small, I was taken care by my aunt (my dad's sister) with my 2 other siblings, 2 other cousins and her 5 kids. It was a big number right? Like a nursery! But my aunt is the best care taker ever! She'd taught us a lot of things, including SHARING. She is a perfectionist. Every time she cooks, she'd make an even portion to everyone - us, and her own kids. If she fried paratha or even cekodok and her kids got 3 pieces, the rest would get the same amount. Nobody would go to the kitchen and had the meal first. Everybody'd have his/her own portion and eat together. If someone got back from school and brought back a sweet, she'd divide into how many of us. If it wasn't enough for all of us, she'd take it and said that it's not enough for everyone so it's more appropriate if she took it and ate it. And we'd all agree. Hehe... 

I was also taught to always remember my other siblings when I want to buy some 'jajan' etc. If I had it just for myself, I had to finish it before I reach home. And don't mention about it. If not, then I'd to share with the other siblings. We used to live in a big family (our neighbors were our cousins) and some of us not so wealthy. It was not nice to brag about something we had but others just had to listen with -maybe- frustration or hope. Remember, kids way of thinking and priority is different.

Up till now (i'm old enough for this... I guess.hehe), if we want to celebrate birthday, or having our favorite chocolates, we would wait until everybody is around, or at least (like the chocolates) divide it evenly so that everybody will get the same amount and taste each flavor. Hahaha.... Somehow we enjoy doing it (gadoh2 main2 siapa banyak siapa sikit padahal dah bagi sama rata. And boleh tukar atas dasar suka sama suka.)

4. Sharing responsibility - By educating our children the true meaning of sharing, we are also teaching them to be more helpful. We can start teaching them by doing small chores together, or at least to tidy up their own belongings. If they make the mess, it's better if we ask them to help us clean up the mess-together. We can't expect kids to be fully responsible for what they have done, and so it's better to lead the cleaning process with them rather than just nag to them, hoping that they will do it by themselves. We can also ask them simple question like "Would you like to help me setting up the table?" or "Do you mind helping me hang the sejadah please?"... We can also encourage them to be responsible by throwing their own dirty diaper or trash into the dustbin, and keep their own shoes in the shoe cabinet. Don't forget to praise them and say THANK YOU and never ever redo the chores they've done helping you. If you really can't stand looking at the improper clothes they've helped you fold, redo it later when they're not around. And remember, they can't do it as perfect as us adult, but the main point is not to reach perfection. So don't complaint their work. They'll feel unappreciated.

5. Donate - I used to join comparative religion study back in university time. I'd the chance to join Christianity 'usrah', their mass event, and other important events too. I love being in the church. Everyone was treated as family. And you know what, the church was so lively every time they had an event. One thing I notice about the Christians, they encourage their kids to donate to the church from an early age. From what I'd noticed, the parents will give each of the kids certain amount of money and each of the kids had the opportunity to donate the money to the church. 

We are not educating our children to be silly, by simply giving our belongings to other. We are teaching them to be generous. So we have to work on it with explanations and strategies.

6. Family saving box - This is interesting. Apart from educating our children to do saving in her/his personal fund, why don't we create a fund who is under everyone's responsibility, and the profit will also benefit the family members. 

We have this since I was in school age. Everyone has to invest money. We do it on monthly basis. Of course the amount is not the same. Parents and adults (who is working already, or seen as wealthy enough. hehe) have to donate bigger amount than the school kids. For example, kids below 12 yo have to invest 50 cents per month, whereas adults have to invest RM2 or RM5 per month. Log book is necessary to maintain justice, transparency, etc. The money will be spent together on something everyone is agreed upon, but some amount will be carrying forward. In case somebody need to borrow the money, he/she can borrow from the family saving box but on one strict condition, must pay back :) We'd used the money for our family vacation in 2009 and everyone was happy and felt the contribution -not only rely on dad's money. Hehe...

It's a lot more other interesting ways to educate our children about sharing. Everyone is welcome to add up and SHARE the tips:) 

Selingan.... below is my son singing one of his favorite song "Flowers are red" he also sings "Allah knows" but tak larat nak upload byk2. Hehe...it was recorded in audio version but I can't upload it directly so I've no choice but to make a video out of it. main amik je gambar2 Aaron secara random :)

Oh,  the song is from Zain Bikha album entitled "Allah knows". A very interesting album for kids and adults too :)




video


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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Daddy, Ummi & Adik Baby

Last monday, before kami check in di Concorde, kami sempat buat monthly check up. Alhamdulillah, adik baby dah 19 weeks++. EDD mengikut ultrasound adalah pada 22/10/12 (Akh Aaron lahir 22/2/10). Memang nombor 0,1,2 je eh? Hehe.... Tapi kalau mengikut doc, jika ditakdirkan I ni memang tak boleh bersalin normal, biasanya by weeks 36 to 38 doc akan induce dah. tak perlu tunggu 40 weeks. (Oh I was diagnosed with CPD via MRI scan during my previous pregnancy). 

Anyway, mengikut scan, perkembangan adik baby baik. Alhamdulillah, ukuran diameter skull, abdomen, semuanya sesuai. Fetus heart pun positive. Adik baby pun sama macam abang dia, kuat menendang termasuklah time doc tengah scan. Hehe... Cume untuk memastikan further health condition seperti cleft, formation of organs macam kidney, lung, liver, etc doc suruh buat check up dekat O&G specialist. Tak pe lah, yang tu nanti dulu. Ummi pun tengah survey lagi nak bersalin kat mana kalini. Hihi...

Kalau mengikut babycentre.com, by this week sensory development adik baby sudah semakin sensitif. Ummi sepatutnya kena banyak bercakap dan mengaji kepada adik baby supaya inshaAllah dapat membantu perkembangan minda adik baby....

Memang tak dinafikan pregnant anak pertama dengan kedua ni ada perbezaan. Seperti yang I dah ceritakan pada post2 yang sebelum ni, perbezaan tu more to simptom dan penjagaan. Tapi untuk kali ni ia lebih dari sekadar simptom. Kalau si abang dulu I dah ada nama dari dia belum di alam rahim lagi, tapi untuk yang ini, nama tu memang dah ada la dalam list, tapi masih samar2. Siapa cakap bila dah pernah pregnant, the next pregnancy akan jadi mudah. Yes in some way, tapi sebenarnya walaupun baru 2 tahun yang lalu I pregnant, tapi bila pregnant lagi banyak jugak I kena belajar or recall semula. OK la tu kan. Baru la rasa seronok. Hehe...

Kalau dengan si abang dulu setiap hari dia akan dengar suara Ummi mengaji (kecuali time Ummi mengelat.hehe), dan hampir setiap malam daddy akan mengaji untuk abang, tapi untuk adik baby, Daddy minta maaf sangat sebab daddy jauh. Daddy cume boleh mengaji dari jauh. Adik baby hanya dapat dengar suara Ummi mengaji untuk adik baby. Tapi tak apa, kita mengaji sama2, inshaAllah kita khatam lagi ye. 

Daddy jugak minta maaf pada adik baby sebab Daddy tak dapat nak hari2 bercakap dengan adik baby. Sebab daddy jauh. Tapi tiap2 malam bila daddy call Ummi adik baby ni macam tau pulak time tu lah dia nak menendang2 memberi respon :)

And Daddy jugak minta maaf pada Ummi sebab tak dapat jaga Ummi sebaik Daddy jaga Ummi pada pregnancy yang sebelumni. Kasih sayang Daddy pada adik baby tetap sama. Malah kami yakin adik baby akan menjadi anak yang kuat dan soleh, inshaAllah...

Sebabtulah, seboleh2nya Daddy akan cuba balik sebulan sekali walaupun hanya 3 hari shj, sebab Daddy taknak miss monthly check up adik baby. Itu bukanlah kehendak Ummi, tapi kehendak Daddy. Biarlah sesetengah orang ingat Ummi ni manja ke apa. Tapi sebagai suami dan daddy, Daddy dah berusaha yang terbaik mungkin untuk kita. Duit bukanlah boleh membeli kebahagiaan dan kasih sayang. Lagipun ini cuma untuk sementara sahaja. Tahun depan kita boleh berkumpul sama2 hari2 :)

Walaupun Ummi tak dapat menumpukan 100% perhatian kepada adik baby sebab kena berkongsi perhatian dengan Akh Aaron, tapi adik baby kena tahu yang in some other way adik baby lebih beruntung. Walaupun Daddy jauh dan Ummi sibuk, tapi hari2 Akh Aaron akan datang kiss adik baby and main2 dengan Adik Baby. Akh Aaron suka main 'tickle tickle baby'. Sometimes memanglah Akh Aaron akan lasak sikit, tapi adik beradik kenalah sayang menyayangi dan maaf memaafi ye :)

Adik baby juga beruntung sebab walaupun Daddy jauh, tapi masih ada ramai lagi yang selalu mengikuti perkembangan adik baby. So Ummi doakan adik baby sihat, dan lahir menjadi anak yang soleh dan mukmin yang berjaya. Amiinnn....

Akh Aaron Houdd pun sama. Kecik2 dah berjauhan dengan Daddy. Walhal time macamnilah waktu yang paling sesuai untuk Daddy mendidik anak2nya macam2 pelajaran. Aaron pun dah tak banyak 'Daddy & Son time' macam dulu. Tapi Daddy tetap sayang, sama macam dulu...

And for the first time after 3 months being in long distant relationship, malam ni Ummi terasa sebak sangat. Sebak sebab memikirkan betapa anak2 Ummi memerlukan Daddy nya, sama macam Ummi memerlukan suami di sisi. Untuk diri Ummi, Ummi rasa inshaAllah OK. Cuma untuk anak2 Ummi, terasa sebak rasanya... Begitu juga bila memikirkan Daddy yang hari2 sunyi sorang2 di sana. Tak dapat nak melihat keletah anak2 melihat wajah isteri. Mesti lagi pedih rasanya.

Teringat 5 hari yang lalu betapa bahagianya kita sekeluarga dapat berkumpul bersama. Teringat setiap pagi Daddy akan suapkan Obimin pada Ummi everytime after breakfast dan Akh Aaron akan berebut dengan Daddy nak bagi Ummi medicine. Teringat pada malam terakhir Daddy bersama kita Ummi dah mula demam teruk, jarang Ummi minta ubat kecuali dah teruk macam malam tu, entah pukul berapa pagi Daddy keluar belikan Ummi paracetamol. And terngiang2 suara Daddy mengaji untuk adik baby dan Akh Aaron yang sedang tidur. Semuanya Ummi teringat masa Ummi mengaji bersama adik baby tadi... Sebaknya rasa hati...

Teringat juga detik2 perit yang terpaksa kita lalui sepanjang ketiadaan Daddy. Masa Aaron demam panas, 2 malam berturut2 Ummi berkejar ke A&E SDMC. Masa setiap kali kereta buat hal, masa Ummi mabuk dan sakit belakang malam2, masa Aaron wean from BF sebulan yang lepas, masa Aaron mengamuk malam2. Ada banyak perkara yang kita lalui bertiga (Ummi, Akh Aaron & adik baby). Ada banyak juga yang dibantu oleh family. Alhamdulillah, semuanya kenangan buat Ummi...

Sebabtulah, sekarangni Ummi tak boleh berpisah langsung dari Aaron Houdd walaupun hanya untuk satu malam.... Dan Ummi selalu berdoa agar adik baby membesar menjadi anak yang soleh. Ummi bersyukur punya anak2 yang membahagiakan hati Ummi di samping Daddy yang jauh tetapi dekat di hati...


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Thursday, May 17, 2012

Setiap anak berbeza-beza

Selamat Hari Ibu kepada rakan2 fabulous moms sekalian alam! Moga kita semua menjadi ibu2 yang solehah di dalam mendidik anak2. Aminnnn :)

OK. harini I nak membebel pasal anak. Biasalah kan. Mak-mak ni tak lain sikit2 nak cerita pasal anak. Ye tak. OK lah tu. Daripada dok mengumpat pasal orang lain, lebih baik cerita pasal anak2 sendiri. Tapi, cerita tu biarlah berpada-pada ye tak. Anak kita pun manusia. Sungguhpun masih kecil, tapi tetap punya perasaan dan perlu dihormati maruahnya. And jangan pulak cerita sakan sampai orang lain pun dok meluat macam lah anak kita lah the best. Hehe...

Kali ni, mari kita bercerita tentang karakter anak2. Semua orang tahu setiap anak memang berbeza-beza karakter dan sikapnya. Kalau ada 10 orang anak, 10 different karakter lah yang kena kita hadapi. Perbezaan karakter ni biasanya dah boleh nampak dari masa pregnant lagi. Setiap anak pembawaanya takkan sama 100%.

Macam I, masa pregnant Aaron Houdd dulu mabuk sampai rasa macam serik dah nak pregnant. I masih ingat I pernah cakap kat hubby rasa macam ni last dah pregnant. Masa tu sebab dah terjelopok dalam toilet sebab kes mabuk yang teruk. Pernah I terlelap dalam toilet jugak. Dan simptom mabuk menyerang sampai ke hujung nak bersalin. Selain mabuk, I kena sakit belakang yang kronik sampai kalau baring, nak bangun tu sampai bertongkat2 and menggagau carik dinding ke apa utk berpaut. Sakit yang amat sampai kekadang tu terjerit-jerit manja jugak la. And time ni, perut tak buncit lagi pun dah dok gosok2 sekali sekali pastu tersengih2 sendirian. Hati pun selalu berdebar2 takut campur happy sebab akan bergelar ibu. Time ni segala raw food termasuklah salad I memang tak makan. Semuanya mesti well cooked. And en.hubby memang amat-amat concern sampai I cuci toilet pun tak boleh sebab guna chemical yang kuat utk sental toilet (Padahal kat lab hari2 buat kerja guna chemical bahaya. Hehe). Perkembangan baby jgn cakap lah. Walaupun dalam buku biasanya bg weekly development, I boleh dikatakan tiap2 malam akan baca buku nak tahu development baby.

Masa pregnant yang I miscarriage last year pulak, dok nak makan tutti frutti je hari2. Rasa heaven sungguh kalau dapat. I ingat I ada cakap dekat my hubby kalau tak makan satu hari pun takpe asalkan dapat benda alah ni (tutti frutti). Masa tu memang bulan puasa pun.

Masa pregnant kali ni pulak. Mabuk tu memang kemestian lah kot. Tapi I perasan kali ni mabuknya taklah seteruk masa Aaron Houdd dulu. Alhamdulillah, hubby pun takde, selalu I doa supaya dipermudahkan urusan terutamanya dalam pregnancy. Cuma agak sedih utk baby kalini, I start mengaji betul2 utk baby pun lambat, pastu lambat juga rasa connection dengan baby. Bab makan pun I tak berapa strict sangat macam dulu tapi I perasan I prefer Nandos berbanding makanan2 lain.hehe.. Baby development so far I update dari weekly mail from baby center je (since buku pun dah dipinjam orang and masih belum dipulang2. Tp tak pe pun. Hehe) Bukan tak sayang. Cume terlalu dibusykan dengan yang depan mata yang perlukan perhatian 24 hours (siapa lagi, si budak hero tu lah) and kerja2 and study. Sekarang dah 17 weeks++ so dah mula rasa baby bergerak, baru lah I rasa lebih kuat connection dgn baby. Kesian adik baby. Tapi takpe, Ummi yakin baby akan membesar jadi strong child sebab baby and ummi sama2 menempuh cabaran dgn ketiadaan daddy. Lagipun kita ada Akh Aaron untuk jaga kita di sini :)

Development milestone dan cabaran di dalam mendidik anak2 pun tak sama antara anak2 kita dan juga anak2 orang lain. Contohnya my son, dia memang amat terkenal dengan kepetahannya di dalam bercakap. (Nak nama after prophet Haruun yang petah berdebat, dapat anak petah bercakap. Hehe). Bagi sesetengah ibu2 di luar sana kalau terbaca about my son in my blog, bila I inform anak I banyak vocab, pandai menyanyi, tapi bila tengok anak2 sendiri yang mungkin dah sama umur dengan Aaron tapi belum bercakap lagi... Janganlah bersedih. Sebab anak2 kalian punyai karakter yang berbeza. Lambat bercakap, tapi mungkin cepat di dalam bab2 lain.

Aaron Houdd memang seorang anak yang bijak, tetapi cabaran I di dalam mendidik dan membesarkan Aaron Houdd ada di tempat lain. Kalau dah bijak tu, pening juga kepala nak handle ye tak. Dan cabaran terbesar I di dalam mendidik Aaron pada masa ni adalah untuk menjadikan dia anak yang kurang manja dan pandai berkongsi. Mungkin rakan2 lain tak mengalami apa yang I alami. Atau mungkin juga ye. Mungkin you all boleh memasak dengan aman dan anak boleh main and tidur sendiri. Tapi Aaron Houdd tidak. Aaron Houdd juga adalah seorang yang picky eater tahap gaban. Memang boleh tahan menyusu sahaja sehari suntuk. Nasi memang dia tak gemar langsung. I dok fikir benda ni sampai kadang2 termasuk dalam mimpi. And disebabkan Aaron tak suka makan, agak sukar untuk kami makan di luar sebab Aaron bosan duduk di meja makan sebab dia tak join makan sekali. Biasanya kami terpaksa bergilir2 makan. Perkara ni mungkin tak dihadapi oleh you all. Anak2 kita memang berbeza-beza sifat dan karakternya.

Di dalam mendidik anak, kita sebagai parents memang kena terer ilmu psikology kanak2, selain punyai kesabaran yang tebal. Tak boleh kita pukul rata semua anak sama. Juga kurang sesuai untuk kita selalu membanding2 kan anak kita dengan adik beradiknya yang lain, atau pun dengan anak orang lain. Kalau perbandingan tu memberi kesan positif mungkin lah boleh. Tapi apa yang biasa dilakukan oleh parents adalah terlalu sering membanding2 kan anak dengan yang lain sehingga hilang nilai positifnya. Lebih baik jika kita bandingkan pencapaiannya secara berkala, sbg contoh, daripada kita bandingkan anak kita dengan anak jiran yang selalu dapat markah tinggi dalam exam, lebih baik kita bandingkan pencapaian exam anak kita yang terkini dengan yang sebelumnya. Lebih praktikal dan realistik rasanya. Jika pencapaiannya baik, kita puji. Jika tidak, kita tegur. Bukan hanya memandang yang negatif kerana secara tak langsung kita juga akan melahirkan anak2 yang berfikiran negatif dan hanya suka menilai sesuatu dari sisi yang negatif sahaja.

Perbezaan tak semestinya membawa kekusutan. Dengan adanya perbezaan lah kadangkala sesebuah keluarga itu mencapai kebahagiaan. Jika si abang pemarah sifatnya, mungkin si adik lebih cool. Jika si kakak agak tinggi egonya, bila ibu ayah merajuk dengan anak2 kakak pun turut merajuk sama, mungkin si adik yang menjadi pendamai, memujuk hati ibu ayah dan menasihati kakak.

Jadi sebagai parents (especially para ibu), nak tak nak kita memang kena menjadi pakar psikologi anak2 kita sendiri. Kita kena tahu karakter setiap seorang dari anak2 kita. Suami pun perlu lah membantu bagi melahirkan suasana yang positif ye :)

Like daddy like son. Akh Aaron Houdd :)
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Peace Be Upon You (",)

Peace Be Upon You (",)

Tribute to all mothers in the world!